Summary of Kara King's The Power of the Pussy | Part 3 of 3

Better Dating Life Staff

24 juil. 2024

Summary of Kara King's The Power of the Pussy | Part 3 of 3

Swipe Right: The Dos and Don’t of Digital Romance

Photo by Nik / Unsplash

Exploring online dating apps offers a great way to meet guys, but not all sites are equal. Paid sites generally attract higher-quality men. If you have specific interests, niche dating sites like Wooplus.com for plus-sized women, Cougarlife.com for women seeking younger men, and Farmersonly.com for rural singles may suit you better.

To catch a guy's attention online, an eye-catching dating profile is essential. Think of it as marketing yourself—show the best version of you without pretending to be someone else. Next time you're dressed up and looking fabulous, snap a few cute pictures that reflect how you'd look on a first date. It seems obvious, but many overlook this step. Also, remember to smile in your profile pic; a recent poll found that 96% of people prefer a big, happy smile over a sexy pout.

Make sure you align your words and images to create a cohesive and genuine representation of yourself. For instance, some women go on and on in their profile about how they "just want a nice guy," but then go upload some provocative and raunchy pictures of themselves which aren't very consistent with the message they are trying to convey.

A well-crafted online dating profile should highlight all the wonderful things about you. Take the time to create a profile that accurately represents your true self, highlights your best qualities and showcases your personality. Let potential matches know what makes you special, whether it's your sense of humor, love for adventure, or passion for baking. Be authentic and genuine in your description, as it will attract like-minded individuals who appreciate you for who you truly are. You should only include positive statements, and never negative ones. Show potential matches that you're confident, genuine, and ready for a meaningful connection. Remember, your online dating profile is your chance to make a great first impression.

Kara wants you to approach online dating with a mindset of openness. Forget about finding Mr. Perfect and ease up on the criticism. Some women will set their sights way too high, only swiping right for guys who look like they've just stepped out of a magazine. And then, surprise, surprise - they end up with guys who are all talk and no substance. If you are unreasonably picky you’ll be missing out on all the good men out there. So how about you start mixing things up? Give different types of guys a chance to show you what they're all about. You might just be pleasantly surprised by the variety of experiences out there!

When you're out there dating, you're bound to meet a mix of different personalities - some may not be your cup of tea, some may be totally obnoxious, and others so boring they might just put you to sleep. You may even encounter someone who's your opposite in every way. If you end up on a date with someone who acts like a jerk, insults you or is rude to you, don't be scared to just get up and leave. Do it. You'll feel much better afterwards. You deserve to be treated with respect and kindness. And remember, one person's opinion of you doesn't define your worth, just because one guy wasn't right for you, it doesn't mean there aren't others out there who would appreciate you for who you are.

One of the great things about online dating is that it keeps you busy and "unavailable," which men find attractive. At any given moment, you ought to be seeing two to four men. They don't need to know that you're dating multiple people, but being busy and having a full life makes you more desirable. Additionally, it broadens your social circle, introducing you to people you wouldn't meet otherwise.

Make sure you let the guys you meet know you're single, but also make it clear that you're not just looking for fun or a quick fling. You don't want them thinking you're only interested in hooking up. Rather, present yourself as a confident single woman enjoying your freedom and autonomy. This way, they'll see that you're open to meeting someone new and at the same being honest about dating other men without having to spell that out.

When it comes to online dating, safety should always be a top priority. First and foremost, don't let fear hold you back from exploring the world of online dating. In Kara’s opinion, it can be a completely safe way to meet new people. No matter where or how you meet men, there are some basic precautions you should always take. When you start dating someone, be cautious about sharing personal information like your full name or address. It's better to err on the side of caution and protect your privacy. Always meet in public places, and tell someone where you’re going and when you’ll be back. It's also a good idea to set up a separate email address specifically for online dating. Make an email that reflects your personality and interests. For instance, if you're a college student, something like CollegeGirl@gmail.com could work well. Remember, online dating can be a fun and exciting way to meet new people, but it's important to prioritize your safety at all times.

Meeting new people is exciting, so enjoy yourself and have fun. The right person is out there, but you won't find them unless you put yourself out there and give it a try. The next person you meet could be your perfect match.

Think Like a Man

If you ever find yourself at a crossroads, unsure of your next move, just think of your girl Taylor Swift singing "I'd be the man." Yes, that's right, channel your inner-dude and consider how a man might handle the situation. It's no secret that men and women are from different planets when it comes to thinking and acting. This isn't inherently negative; it's just how women and men are wired. So how can we tackle this challenge?

Let's dive into some key differences in how women and men approach dating and romance. For starters, men typically don't let their emotions lead the charge. Guys have this knack for keeping their feelings in check until they're sure she's The One. They don't let emotions cloud their judgment or influence their actions prematurely.

Then there's the matter of not sweating the small stuff – something men seem to have down pat. They're not ones to overanalyze every little detail, and get tangled up in minutiae. Caught yourself overthinking? Borrow a page from their book and snap out of it! Adopting a more laid-back attitude can not only boost your mood but also lead to clearer decision-making down the line.

Thirdly, men typically will not attempt to change a woman's character or behavior. Contrary to the approach often taken by many women, men tend to accept when a romantic interest is not compatible with them and choose to move on. Men don't waste time hanging around trying to play Mr. Fix It. It's crucial to understand that individuals only change if they really want to do so themselves.

Men generally don't make excuses for unacceptable behavior. If someone treats them poorly, they're out of there faster than you can say ghosted. And cheating? Forget about it. It's highly unlikely they'll offer a second chance for betrayal.

Lastly, men are able to distinguish between a "wife" and a "booty call." While women often attempt to futilely turn their casual sexual relationships into committed ones, men clearly differentiate between women they are in love with and those they engage with solely for sexual pleasure and nothing more. Adopt a similar approach as men do: reserve your love and emotional investment for someone who truly deserves you and has earned the title of "husband."

Are you starting to sense a theme here? Thinking like a man is a great power to draw if you're struggling with your dating life. If you're feeling stuck or overwhelmed, ask yourself how a man would approach the situation and let that answer guide your decision. 

However Kara wants to make something clear: when she says "act like a man," she doesn't mean you should try to fit in with the guys. Men don't want you to pretend to like sports or fishing just to impress them. King also advises against joining in sex conversations and talking about your body count as if you were a guy. 

Men generally dislike it when girls try to act like one of the guys, unless she is genuinely being herself and naturally that way. It's important to be authentic and not try to pretend to be someone you're not just to please a guy. This will only turn him off, make you look foolish, and ultimately, it won't work in building a genuine connection.

For example, if you're sitting with a guy watching a game and pretending to be really into it when you'd much rather be watching a romantic movie like The Notebook, he can usually tell that you're not being genuine. So, it's better to be honest about your interests and not pretend to care about something just to impress him. It's important to find common ground and shared interests, but it should be based on mutual respect and genuine connection rather than trying to fit into a mold that doesn't truly represent who you are. Embrace your own unique qualities and interests, and find someone who appreciates and values you for who you truly are.

Follow the tips in "Power of The Pussy," and you'll likely find the right partner. It may take time, but patience increases your chances of meeting the best match. Before settling down, discover yourself and enjoy being single. Have fun and don't rush into a relationship. When you least expect it, you'll meet a special man who loves you through his actions and is faithful and respectful. Your family and friends will like him too. Then, give your heart to him and let love flow. Show him your adoration, respect, and prioritize him in your life. Remember, your efforts shouldn't cease once you've found him. Both parties need to put in work to keep a relationship healthy, and this is where one last superpower comes into play - the power of appreciation.

The Power of Appreciation

Kara’s grandmother once gave her some important words of advice; “If you want a good husband, you have to be a good wife.” At first, Kara thought that this phrase was pretty sexist. Years later, she realized this saying was really about reciprocity. The important message is that if you want a good partner, you have to be a good person to them too. Don't cheat, disrespect, or mistreat them. It's awful when people do that to good partners. When you find someone who loves you and is dedicated to you, you should honor them with your love and loyalty. Save your heart and commitment for them, and don't let anyone else come before them. If they stop being good to you, it's okay to leave and take your love with you. And the same goes for you - if you start being unfaithful or ungrateful, they should leave you too. You don't deserve a great person if you can't be great in return. So, if you want a good partner, be good to them when you find them.

Communication is key to any successful relationship. When they are kind and loving, let them know how much you appreciate it. Thank them for the things they do for you, like taking out the trash. If there's something bothering you, talk to your partner calmly and honestly. Men are terrible at reading between the lines and respond best to direct instructions. So be clear about what you want. Avoid getting angry or being mean. Stay away from complaining, nagging, and screaming. Instead, calmly express your needs and thank him when he takes steps to address the situation.

When it comes to maintaining relationships, it's important to remember that no man is perfect. Some women have a tendency to search for perfection in their partners, constantly finding something wrong with every guy they date. This mindset makes it impossible for them to look past negative qualities. While it's important not to settle for less and to set high standards for yourself, it's equally important to recognize when a man does possess most of the qualities that you want and also treats you well. Are you going to let a few imperfections or irritating qualities get in the way of a potentially amazing relationship? Unfortunately, a lot of women do. In order to have a healthy relationship with a great man, you're going to have to let some things slide. No one is perfect, and as long as his good qualities greatly outweigh the bad ones, learn to overlook those flaws.

With Great Power Comes Great Responsibility

Children pose with Spiderman at the George Floyd protests in Uptown Charlotte, 5/30/2020 (IG: @clay.banks)

Photo by Clay Banks / Unsplash

Being a woman gives you a superpower that comes with a huge responsibility. No, we are not talking about the wall crawling powers of your friendly neighborhood Spider-Man. The superpower you have is right there inside you and that's your uterus. You hold the ability to control two crucial aspects of your life: the timing of your pregnancy and the choice of the father for your children. So think about what you really want. Consider the kind of man you would want to father your children. These choices are some of the most important ones you will ever make, so it's crucial that you are the one in charge. Don't let fate or the men in your life make these decisions for you.

Be proactive about preventing unwanted pregnancies. Kara says that women need to respect the responsibility that comes with having a uterus and need to take more responsibility for their own bodies and make the most of this incredible privilege they have been given. To avoid unintended pregnancies before finding the right partner, commit to using birth control and condoms. These methods prevent accidents until you meet someone deserving to have a child with you. Avoid mistakes like getting pregnant in moments of passion by staying prepared and willing to say no if unprotected.

Passion can be overwhelming and can cloud your judgment. Kara says it is particularly important to be cautious when you are ovulating, as this is when uncontrollable passion often takes over. During this time, your body releases pheromones that can make your partner feel more aroused than usual. Additionally, the surge of hormones during ovulation can make you feel more sexually aroused as well. Therefore, it is crucial not to allow this intense passion to lead to an unintended pregnancy.

Furthermore, it is vital not to become pregnant by men who do not treat you with the respect and care you deserve. Unplanned pregnancies can happen in an instant, so being careful and responsible is a must. Lastly, don't let anyone talk you into thinking that pulling out is a good way to avoid pregnancy. According to Planned Parenthood, about 1 in 5 who use the withdrawal method will get pregnant. So while it may work initially, it is not a reliable method in the long run. Sooner or later, it's probably going to fail and result in an unplanned pregnancy. The best move? Stick with the more reliable birth control methods and condoms to keep yourself safe.

Conclusion

Couple in love at beach during sunset

Recognizing and harnessing the inherent power you possess as a woman is crucial for receiving the respect you're entitled to. This realization will make men strive harder for your affection and attention. Men have manipulated women's feelings for far too long, and it's high time to acknowledge that your pussy is a powerful tool and shift the dynamics!

There are plenty of worthy men out there; it’s just that prolonged engagement with the wrong ones has left you disillusioned. This has led to behaviors that do not reflect your true worth, creating a cycle where you attract incompatible, less deserving partners. The most essential takeaway from The Power of the Pussy is that by centering your dating approach on your own needs and self-worth, you increase your chances of finding the right partner for you.

Dating doesn't have to be challenging or heart-wrenching; with the right understanding, you can modify your tactics and achieve desired outcomes. By reshaping how you see yourself and the men in your life, you will positively improve your dating experiences. Start acknowledging positive features in both your physical appearance and personal traits. Focus on self-improvement and accomplishing your goals. Prioritizing oneself leads to recognizing personal strength - something that is irresistibly attractive for men. Separate good potential partners from unsuitable ones by not rushing into anything - let him prove his worthiness first! The right one will unmistakably identify himself eventually! Upon finding Mr.Right, reciprocate with appreciation while promoting open communication to nurture a healthy bond together.

You possess all necessary tools to craft the life you've always longed for! Don't forget to take these steps: Put in efforts to handle emotions preventing them from ruling your actions; List down all the desired attributes in a man; Describe how an ideal partner should behave with you; Make a list of all your best qualities and keep revisiting it regularly!

About the author

In The Power of the Pussy, author Kara King aims to equip women with the knowledge and skills to achieve their desires, be it love, marriage, respect, or self-empowerment. Kara shares the powerful techniques she learned to shift the balance in her favor after being easily manipulated by men.

While in college, Kara was determined to get hired at a radio station, focusing solely on her career and not on relationships. Despite her busy schedule, she tried online dating and was amazed by the number of interested men. It boosted her confidence and opened her eyes to new possibilities. Amidst serial dating and career building, she unexpectedly met a guy who ticked all the boxes on her "dream man" list, proving that when a man genuinely likes you, he will respect your boundaries and desires.

Kara's ambition made her an on-air personality and producer at Power 96, a top Miami radio station, and a best-selling author. She's a proud mother of four, has been married for over 15 years to the man of her dreams, and is living proof that you can achieve your dreams. Her message: you have the power to shape your destiny and create the life you deserve.

We hope you enjoyed this summary of Kara King’s The Power of the Pussy. If you want to dive further into the great advice and techniques of this book you can pick up a copy here.

Kara also wrote a follow up, an equally helpful and eye-opening book, The Power of the Pussy Part Two: Dating, Marriage, and Divorce Advice for Women. If you are interested in reading that, just click here.

For more information on Kara and her other services, you can visit her website at catsdontchasedogs.com

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